I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize