physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
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yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
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My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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