That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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