Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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