can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
