yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
