I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
