And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.