I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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