Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
