I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
