So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
