Can Purell be used as lube?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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