Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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