Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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