Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
