you guys were way drunker than both of me
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
