Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
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She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
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Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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