there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
