yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
