she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
