My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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