Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize