I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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