HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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