What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize