i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
We're too hungover to prance.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
