I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
We got so high we made milksteak
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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