He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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