I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
His hands were made for my vagina.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
