I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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