So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You're like the curious george of whores
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
