sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Randomize