it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
