There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
