whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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