He is like the real live version of the state fair..
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
