Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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