Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
