And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
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