My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize