I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
