i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
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