Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Randomize
