ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
