My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
