Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
