He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
