Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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