Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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