Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
